There is a Subway restaurant not too far from my house. I like Subway. However, there is a new employee that causes me to cringe internally everytime I realize that she will be my" Sandwich Artist." The following is a transcript ... of my recent visit. ( okay. to the best of my recollection...)
Welcome to Subway. What can I get you ?
Six inch honey oat. Roast Beef. No Cheese. Toasted.
Okay. What kind of bread ?
Honey Oat, Roast Beef.
And the meat ?
Roast Beef.
Would you like that toasted ?
Yes.
What kind of cheese ?
No Cheese.
What kind ?
None.
Okay.
- We pause as toasting takes about 30 seconds. - Back to the action.
Mustard and Mayo?
No. Thank you. Ill have spicy mustard after everything is on.
Mayo ?
No. Just spicy mustard... on everything .. at ( she is putting it on the meat now ) the end. That's good. Thank you.
- as she reaches for the veggies.
Light on Lettuce. No tomatoes.
( huge pile of lettuce )
Could you take some of the lettuce off?
Oh, yes.
Not tomatoes.
( She is reaching for the tomatoes )
No tomatoes.
Pardon? ( Tomatoes are now on the relatively large pile of lettuce )
No tomatoes, can you take the tomatoes off ?
Oh, yes. Sorry....
Extra black olives.
Pardon ?
Extra black olives.
Olives ?
Yes. Could I have a few extra?
Yes.
And everything else ...
Do you want cucumber....?
Yes, everything else.
Onions....?
Yeah. Everything...
Is that it ?
Yes. Thats everything. And thats good. Im good.
She reaches for the Oil.
No oil please... Im good.
That's all ?
Yes. Im good. We are done....
For here ?
Yes. And, Ill take chips too....
Chips ?
Yes. Potato Chips.
She leaves to get the chips. I know full well what is about to happen.
From the back....
What kind...?
--------------------------
That pretty much sums it up.... Every time I have her as my SANDWICH ARTIST....
EVERYTIME....
is it me ?
Welcome to Subway. What can I get you ?
Six inch honey oat. Roast Beef. No Cheese. Toasted.
Okay. What kind of bread ?
Honey Oat, Roast Beef.
And the meat ?
Roast Beef.
Would you like that toasted ?
Yes.
What kind of cheese ?
No Cheese.
What kind ?
None.
Okay.
- We pause as toasting takes about 30 seconds. - Back to the action.
Mustard and Mayo?
No. Thank you. Ill have spicy mustard after everything is on.
Mayo ?
No. Just spicy mustard... on everything .. at ( she is putting it on the meat now ) the end. That's good. Thank you.
- as she reaches for the veggies.
Light on Lettuce. No tomatoes.
( huge pile of lettuce )
Could you take some of the lettuce off?
Oh, yes.
Not tomatoes.
( She is reaching for the tomatoes )
No tomatoes.
Pardon? ( Tomatoes are now on the relatively large pile of lettuce )
No tomatoes, can you take the tomatoes off ?
Oh, yes. Sorry....
Extra black olives.
Pardon ?
Extra black olives.
Olives ?
Yes. Could I have a few extra?
Yes.
And everything else ...
Do you want cucumber....?
Yes, everything else.
Onions....?
Yeah. Everything...
Is that it ?
Yes. Thats everything. And thats good. Im good.
She reaches for the Oil.
No oil please... Im good.
That's all ?
Yes. Im good. We are done....
For here ?
Yes. And, Ill take chips too....
Chips ?
Yes. Potato Chips.
She leaves to get the chips. I know full well what is about to happen.
From the back....
What kind...?
--------------------------
That pretty much sums it up.... Every time I have her as my SANDWICH ARTIST....
EVERYTIME....
is it me ?
3 comments:
I'm gonna be a smart ass and say if you'd come to my house for dinner that wouldn't have happened! lol
Ahh but are you a sandwich artist ?
Well, for that you'd have to come over and find out for yourself, but I will say this: you wouldn't have to tell me twice what you wanted! ; )
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